Friday, February 11, 2011

A Husband's Love

He opens the sticky door to their apartment. She slowly takes steps, one at a time, watching the floor, the welcome mat, the slight bump to the outside. He takes her cane and goes down the steps while she looks and watches him. She patiently waits at the top step, not holding anything but the rail is there waiting for her. He rushes up the stairs, wanting to be right with her.
She smiles.

She says "Ready?" He says "Yes" She takes her step, right foot first then left foot right beside the right. Again, right foot first then left foot, holding the rail with her left hand to steady herself. One step at a time. He is right in front of her, taking one step backwards with each of hers. Almost as a dance but she leads the pace. Fourteen steps, one at a time. Some days slow and some days faster. He gives her a kiss when they get to the last step. He grabs the cane with four feet and hands it to her. She places her small hand on the cane and continues to walk down the path. The wind blowing in her ponytail and she hopes that the wind does not blow her down. She steadies herself and he waits.

They arrive at the car, he opens the door, she gets in with ease and he puts the cane on the back seat. He helps her buckle the seat belt, sometimes help not needed but today she needs him. She says "Thank you." She looks out the window amazed at how the world looks different outside than from their apartment window. When they go anywhere she wants to look at everything. Most of the time he is taking her to doctor visits and therapy lessons. He took her on a few adventures to a restaurant, the mall and to church, all on good days. He is always making sure she is safe. Today it is just a ride. He leans over and kisses her while stopped at a busy stop light.

They come back to their apartment and the routine starts again. Grab the cane, open the door, wait patiently as she stands up and places her cane in her left hand. One day he will be able to hold her hand instead. For now, it is wait, watch, protect, be her support. Up the stairs, one step at a time, left foot first, then right foot, left hand reaching across to grab the rail, right hand tries but lets go. He is right behind her, walking one step at a time. He opens the door after reaching the top and watches her walk over the bump, the mat onto the carpet. Whew they are home.

I love my husband. All he does for me and our family. The cooking, cleaning, laundry, the cats needs, homework for daughter, making sure we have our medicines, and much more. All the things I use to do he has picked up. Not everything gets done but I've learned that life is so much more than a clean house. He calms me down and helps me when I need help. Not a traditional family setup but one that works for us. He knows I still have issues but he loves me still. Thank You Father for my husband!


Hillbilly Handiworks said...

You both have been through so much.

Do you know if you have any character changes since the stroke? My husband is so fussy sometimes that it is hurtful. It isn't who he used to be. I've researched and it seems that it just might be that way. I get frustrated; then I have to remind myself that he's not the same person I married...yet he is.

Just wondering as this week has kind of been tough in this area. Please don't comment about this on my blog. He'll read it.

Sara G said...

I have to admit that yes there has been some character changes. I call it "amplified" on most things. For example, my anger, went from some, not towards my husband but others when there were issues. But after my stroke that anger was so much. 3x as much some days. We had times of hurtful words, hurtful actions. My own frustrations and grief over what I lost in function and confusion about what is going on. Took several months to process my thoughts but even now I have to be really be careful. I know we all are different but I think that it takes lots of love, understanding or trying to understand and not allow the reaction of others to affect our reaction. When hubby wouldn't understand sometimes his reactions set my anger into a deeper mode.
I cry a lot more and anything sets me off even silly things and off I go weeping. Not always understanding why.
I hope this helps some! Pray for your husband and I will pray for you and him. Big Hugs!

Stacy@hiswaynotmine said...

Hi Sara,
Your testimony is amazing and your words inspiring. I am so sorry for all that you have gone close your words hit home. My mother had a brain aneurysm when she was 34. She lives with us now in an attached in-law apartment. She has left side paralysis, but walks with a cane and is pretty independent. But as I read your words about each step, patience with each step, placing the cane....etc....I pictured you and I pictured my mom. How real it is. What a blessing God has given you in your husband. I will be praying for you.

It is so nice meeting you. Thank you for your sweet comments on my blog and for stopping by. I love meeting new sisters in the Lord!

Much love in Christ,

John and Elisa Seaba said...

Hi Sara, thanks for you comment on my blog! I have just gone back and read your story. Thank you for sharing it! Your post today was so sweet! how neat to have a husband that is right by your side helping you along the way!

lisasmith said...

What a beautiful gift your words and finding you here are today. I have no doubt I will be cheering as you take many, many more steps!!